There was a 14 year old girl and a 15 year old boy. He was new at her school and very cute. Which shouldn’t be important, but it
was. They were both sophomores in high
school. She was a cheerleader. He was a football player. She knew he was out of her league. All the popular girls liked him and she was
not a “popular” girl. He was extremely
smart and seemed to know it. Her dream
man was an artsy, poetic, romantic type.
His dream girl was an athletic type.
She was not athletic…at all. He
was not artsy…at all. So that year came
and went. She secretly liked him, but
was dealing with a lot of other emotions and drama in her life so she pushed
those feelings aside.
Until that summer.
Let’s back up. At the end of the
year, during all the yearbook signing shenanigans he put his number in her
yearbook. And she gave him hers as
well. She was not in the habit of
calling boys. So she didn’t. And he didn’t. He was a little chicken. After all…He was only just 16. Ok, back to the summer. All that “stuff” she was dealing with…well it
was a little more serious than just stuff.
There were things that no just 15 year old girl should need or know how
to deal with. You see, she had lost her
dad when she was 12 and was dealing with latent anger, depression, and
questioning of who she was and what her purpose was in this world…you
know…normal teenage things. Well she had
tried make it all go away her sophomore year and never truly resolved her
feelings and emotions. That summer, she
almost did it again. But she didn’t want
to. She was battling with the enemy and
she desperately didn’t want him to win.
She needed someone to talk to. She didn’t want to be a burden. So she prayed. She asked God to show her who to talk
to. Through tears she scrolled through
her phone without looking and when she stopped…the name that appeared was
someone she had never called. Someone
she had never shared anything personal with really.
So she texted him.
She told him personal things about what she was feeling and what she
wanted to do. He told her later that he
was scared NOT to respond…so he did. And
she was so glad he did. She felt
loved. Silly, isn’t it? How someone you don’t really know just
letting you talk makes you feel loved?
He was at football camp during all of this, so the talking was between
practices, but it was the start of something…strangely beautiful.
The two began officially dating on August 20, 2005. She was 15.
He was 16. They were juniors in high school.
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| High School Years. |
During those last high
school years he dealt with a crazy, emotional, hopelessly romantic girl. She dealt with a 2 time concussion victim who
went a little crazy himself. She scared
him. He scared her. But together they grew. Together they shaped each other into people
who have seen the very worst of each other and still love. She was always fearful of him leaving
her. He didn’t like this. He stood up to her. He told her that she was allowing her tainted
image of men to influence how she viewed him.
She broke down. No one had ever
stood up to her…really. No one ever
seemed to love her enough to tell her the truth. She realized she was fearful that all men
were abusive. All men yelled. All men thought she wasn’t good enough. She realized she was wrong. He was a little intimidated by how passionate
she was. He liked to be certain of
everything. He liked to be in control. He didn’t like that she seemed to have a
blind faith. He didn’t really like that
she took risks.
They were complete opposites.
They graduated high school and ended up going to the same
college. He almost went somewhere
else. To this day, she thinks she
convinced him to stay close to her, and she sometimes fears she tied him
down. But he tells her she is wrong.
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| At a USC baseball game. |
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| In Charleston while we were dating. One of our favorite places. |
They grew together and she constantly asked
him about the future. She was a little
pushy. She doesn’t like that about
herself.
Sophomore year of college, they were both going to school
and working. She had worked since she
was 15 as had he. She was completely
supporting herself. They talked about
the future. That summer, he proposed on
the beach at sunset. Positively
romantic. She said yes. They were completely and unmistakably
happy.
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| The day after he proposed! |
Life happened. She
realized she didn’t have enough money to finish school and was accumulating a
lot of debt for something she realized she wasn’t supposed to be doing. She felt the Lord calling her into
ministry. She felt she was supposed to
stop the pursuit of her degree. He
listened to her and believed what the Lord was telling her. He had grown exponentially in his desire to
control the situation. Because in this
case…no one had control. She did not go
back to school in the fall, but followed the Lord’s leading and began working
in a children’s ministry. She was then
sure this is what she was made to do. In
that season.
The two were married his junior year of college. She was 20.
She was 21. Many said they were
too young. Many said they had not
experienced the “college life.” They
were supposed to have a carefree time of no worries and no regrets. Well, many had not lived their life. Their life was anything but carefree. They were sure that their lives were supposed
to be lived together.
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| My ladies! |
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| His men! |
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| Vowing to love. |
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| The kiss. |
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| The dance. |
They had always been fearful they would not be able to have
children…a desire they both had. She had
some issues and had been told it would be difficult to have a baby. They were heartbroken. Eight months after
they said “I do” they went to dinner and had a serious conversation about what
they would do if they could not have a baby.
The next day, they found out they were pregnant. She was 21. He was 22.
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| Positive! |
Nine months later they had a beautiful little girl.
This little girl changed their lives. She realized she had to work harder at being
a wife who shows her husband how much she loves and respects him. He realized he had to lead his family and be
an example of Christ’s love to them.
Together, they have realized they are better people. They are completely different then when they
met seven years earlier. They are two
people who have learned what love means.
Love is sacrificial. Love seeks
to serve the other person. Love is just
being. Love is difficult. Love costs.
Love is worth it all.
And that is why we did. Because love is worth everything.
